An Ordinary Mom's Musings

Recently while commenting on a thread on Facebook about an article, I was accused by someone I do not know, of stealing his money because I send my children to public school. His belief was that parents should pay for their own child’s education and that others should not be taxed to pay for it. I was accused of being uneducated and not knowing what I was talking about.  I was dumbfounded.

This experience, for me, crystallized everything that I believe is currently wrong with this country and our inability to have an open and frank dialogue.

It is impossible to have a conversation at this point about things we don’t agree on. We can’t seem to have a respectful conversation when it comes to beliefs and political leanings. We believe we have to verbally attack people. Our thought is that we cannot be wrong, so the other person has to be wrong. We call them out.

Or we don’t want to upset the conversation so we completely avoid saying what we think about a subject to keep the peace.

Going back to the Facebook exchange- When I stepped back and thought about it, I understood where he was coming from. I don’t agree, but I can understand. I had a similar thought process years ago.

Public school had been a nightmare for me growing up and my parents had homeschooled me from 6th-12th grade. Being homeschooled was one of the best things for me. I love the homeschooling movement. I thought everyone should do homeschool. When it came to voting for more taxes to rebuild schools I always voted no because I knew there was a better way. Just homeschool! You don’t need another building!

Over time, my thought process has changed.

I had children of my own. I tried to homeschool them for the first couple of years and I learned, against my will, that homeschooling was not going to work for our family. Our children needed to learn from someone else. And because we have a child with significant special needs, private school was out of the question. Our extra resources were taken up caring for his needs.

Putting my children in public school has given me a window into other perspectives. The city we currently live in, and the previous city in which we resided, have a diverse racial and ethnic makeup. Our previous city- Anchorage AK, has been found to be the most racially diverse city in America. Both Anchorage, and Federal Way WA have had high numbers of refugee children. There too there is the homeless population.

How are the parents of children from war-torn countries with literally nothing supposed to afford private school?  They could homeschool, but they come here not being able to speak our language. They and we would like them to learn English so they can function in our society.  What better way than at school? What about finances? In most immigrant families, both parents work and work long hours. How would that work if they had to homeschool?

What about children in abusive homes? Do we really want them stuck all day with the abuser being homeschooled?

I believe that all children should have the opportunity to get an education.

Often times there are many good ways.

Just because we have found one good way to live, it doesn’t cancel out all the other good ways.

Maybe someone else knows of a better way. Neither way is necessarily bad and maybe it’s just better for that person. Homeschooling was best for me. Going to school is better for my children. Neither choice is bad but one is better for each of us. Education is what matters.

People are each different on a very fundamental level. That’s what makes life fun.

As such, we have different needs and abilities. We need to celebrate and enjoy those differences. I love learning about different cultures and people. The different thought processes and cultures fascinate me.

We need to back away from arguing and listen so we can all get an education.

It has been said that Americans don’t listen to hear. We listen to respond. I find this true.

Neither one is bad.

This is my call to the American people to return to civil discourse. Let’s listen to what our neighbors have to say.