Kids learn that working is important. They learn the value of money. Kids get to practice their parenting skills to begin to figure out what works. This all benefits the community at large.
Month: August 2017
Working as a Parent of a Special Needs Child
I don’t have the answers, but I know there’s a problem.
STEM vs STEAM
A popular move in education is moving schools towards STEM or Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics; so students can keep up in a growing technological world. D has graduated Elementary school this year so I’ve been thinking a lot about Middle School and Education this year as we prepare for the switch in schools for him.
The Middle school that D is supposed to attend recently became a STEM school without consulting the parents and teachers about the switch. All Music, Drama, and Art classes have been dropped. I was told that should at least 40 students band together and want one of those classes, the school will provide an online option.
How in the world do they expect to teach students to tune their instruments via an online class? How will they troubleshoot issues with instruments that inevitably happen with students that are new to the instruments and usually renting the instrument? I could go on and on about how this is not an option that will really work. I’m all for it in places like rural Alaska where it may be the only option, but we live in a suburbs of Seattle and Tacoma WA. This is not our only option.
Here are just some of why the Arts and Humanities are SO important to me and why they should be important to you.
The Arts, any form of art, is creative. It causes you to use a different side of your brain. This side of your brain is what is used to be creative, to be inventive, and innovative, and even in the STEM areas of the industry, you need this to stay ahead. The Arts train your brain to think creatively.
The Arts help prevent and aid in healing mental illness, through people being able to express themselves, be it through writing, and art of any form be it music, dancing, acting. It feeds our soul even if we are only observers.
It has been shown in repeated studies that exposure to and being trained to play a musical instrument makes a person smarter.
If we continue on our current path of focusing solely on STEM, I can see a day one day when the old masters of music, the written word, and art of the world will be lost because our children will not appreciate the beauty and majesty of their creations.
I’m FOR Classical Education which includes a broad learning base. I don’t have a problem in High School or the last couple of years if a child focuses on STEM or some other area that they plan on working in IF they have been given an adequate base of knowledge in Classical Education.
Unexpected Gifts on Vacation
This summer our family was on vacation and due to a lot of reasons (sickness and allergies being chief) it was a difficult vacation. What I didn’t expect though were some unusual but great experiences we had on our vacation.
First, I had the opportunity to meet with a Mom who was struggling to find supports in her area. I don’t think I helped much as I don’t live in the area and could only offer general information, but I hopefully helped her find people who can help. This was good for me as it reminded me of why I do what I do. I remember starting this journey of Special Needs and not having any answers that I needed. I didn’t know where to find supports or how to find them. I swore to myself at that time I would do everything I could to keep other parents from that situation. This experience also gave me a chance to reflect on and say a prayer for all those who have helped me on my journey. I really appreciated that, and I enjoyed making a new friend.
Next, we were visiting some cousins and a 13-year-old with Autism kept coming by to visit. He is pretty severely impacted with Autism and kept escaping from his parent’s home. It filled me with so much joy to see how kindly these cousins interacted with him. If I could clone them and populate the world with them I would, because our kids need people like them who see their beauty and worth and treat them accordingly.
The third experience was meeting up with one of my husband’s best friends from High School. They, like us, have one boy and one girl with the boy having autism. We’ve known many children with autism and while D has enjoyed playing with them I have never seen him connect with another child the way he did with this young man. After dinner, the boys rode in our car back to Grandma’s while the girls rode in the other car. Listening to the two boys in the back of the car nearly brought me to tears! They understood each other on a level no one has understood D before. They “scripted” together (reciting movies line for line), enjoying every minute. 
D told him of what he someday dreams of doing and the young man thought his plans were awesome. I could kick myself for not having spent more time with this family over the years. The girls had a great time too, but listening to those boys in the car was something I wasn’t sure D would ever find. That was truly special.
Vacations and getting out of our bubble can be really hard for families of Special Needs kids. But in spite of everything, it can also be really worth it.
Hats off to the Moms of Young Children
Occasionally we have been watching a set of twin 8-month-old boys. I like doing it because, one, I just plain LOVE babies, and two, it also helps my children who don’t have younger siblings around learn how to care for them. (This week I made R change her first diaper.😉)
A couple weeks ago we had them for a lot of the weekend. They went home at night but would be with us during the day. Sunday made me remember just how hard being a Mom of young children really is. Luckily church wasn’t until 1 pm or we would have NEVER made it out the door. I thought I was doing really well. I loaded up the van with my two kids, Charlie (D’s service dog), the twins in their car seats, and the double stroller that I couldn’t for the life of me figure out how to collapse. Luckily I had one of the seats in the van folded down in the floor already so I ever so carefully smashed, wiggled and worked the stroller into the van fully upright. Success! 
We drove to church, and I was pretty proud of myself. Only a few minutes late! I got the stroller out (much easier than putting it in!) and put the boys in. My kids and the dog got out and we walked into the church. (I felt a bit like I was leading a circus….)
We sit down, and I suddenly realize I don’t have a diaper bag!😩 I quickly asked a friend to watch the kids while I ran back home to get it. I got back just in time to see R just a little frazzled as she tried to keep both the babies from crying.
I sit down and take over.
We get both the babies happy, and one of them starts to laugh, which in turn makes my kids laugh, which makes the other baby laugh. After watching this being repeated multiple times (to my secret amusement), I tried desperately to get my kids to stop laughing. We left the chapel and sat on the floor of the foyer and let the babies crawl around. They LOVED that.
Suddenly it dawned on me that although I had the diaper bag, the formula was in the other bag, which was STILL AT HOME!
The main meeting was almost over so I waited until then and got my children off to class. I left the stroller there, I wasn’t going to try and put it back in my car just to drive home (AGAIN) and back. I took the babies and got their car seats buckled in the car, and again drove home to get the formula. I would have probably gone home for good after the main meeting at this point, except that I had agreed to teach a lesson during the last hour of church. Yes, I know. I’m a glutton for punishment.
I now head back to church for the 3rd time that morning and I am completely frazzled. I found some women to watch the twins while I taught the lesson. (Only after I had accidentally dumped the entire contents of the container of formula out on the floor.) Their Mom walked in in the middle of my lesson and I was SO happy to see her! I had forgotten how crazy it is with little ones, particularly at church.
So my hat goes off to all mother’s of young children. May you find people who will help you through this time when you really think you’d be better off staying home from church. May you find the courage, faith, and patience to keep coming every week. I promise it does get better. And a shout out to the angels who helped me along the way when mine were little.
Can We Get Off This Merry Go Round Now?
“I want some help dammit! Instead, I’m left feeling helpless.”
