An Ordinary Mom's Musings

Recently I returned to school after taking the fall semester off. As I prepared to go back, I worried about my mental and physical health which has been up and down since we moved. I needed a parental IEP.

”Could I really go back to school?”

”Would my body let me?”

”Would my son cooperate?”

Anxiety started to consume me. But I stepped back and said to myself, ”You’ve been given tools to deal with your anxiety. You need to make a plan of how to deal with it WHEN it surfaces.

What could I do to help myself through this transition period?

#1- Don’t listen to my brain. It likes to tell me that I’m not good enough. That I can’t climb the mountain I have in front of me. That I will fail, so why even try? I’ve learned from experience that this is the way my brain works, but I don’t have to listen to it. Acknowledging those feelings and then telling myself that it’s my brain lying to me again, helps me move past things.

#2- I need to take time for me. I love going to school, and it is something I am doing for me, but it’s hard. Making sure the other areas of my life are balanced in order to succeed are important. I need downtime. A long hot bath, a good book, a yummy recipe- These are my self-love languages.

#3- Creating a pseudo plan for the other claims on my time. Children’s jobs written on the blackboard every day before I leave for school. Allowing them an opportunity to be more engaged in the household chores teaches them how to accomplish them and relieves some of my burden. A ROUGH outline of meals for the week on Sunday night. If I feel like baking over the weekend- muffins scones, and egg and sausage McMuffins go in the freezer for quick breakfasts to grab as we are all heading out for the day.

#4- Listening to audiobooks as I drive. I have an hour commute. In that time I can listen to the scriptures, listen to textbooks, or the latest book I’m listening to on Audible. This way my time in the car is profitable and I can use it to accomplish some of my mental to do list.

#5- In an emergency, I have emergency medicine that I carry with me. It’s there. If life gets too overwhelming I can use it to re-set my brain.

Having this plan has made a difference.

On the first day of school in the middle of class, I felt panic rising. I sat with it for a moment, remembered that I had my medication with me, I could take it if I needed to. I decided to breathe, and if it hadn’t subsided by the time class ended I would take one.

The pill wasn’t needed. I had a plan which was reducing my overall stress and I was prepared. But it’s there if I need it.

I recently read this article by Jamie Sumner and realized that what I had essentially done was to write my own IEP for school. These were all things I was working on that will help me succeed. The only part missing in my IEP is setting a percentage of time I will strive to get it right. Because there are bound to be days I fall flat on my face.