Tuesdays are my day when I write the random thoughts in my head. A lot of today’s randomness has been building up in there for awhile- Republicans and Democrats. But it also holds with my blog theme of being different.
As this season of American politics has come to a close for four more years, I’m calling on all of us to take one meaningful step closer, to understanding the other side of the aisle. Let me explain.
As I talk to people who have firm beliefs on both sides of the political, religious, and any other aisle you want to mention, what strikes me is that we all want the same things.
What do you want out of life?
Chances are whatever it is, your neighbor next door who is a different religion or of a different political persuasion wants those things too. However, they may have a different idea of how to go about achieving things that are important to them. Things like the safety of their families and others, the chance to live well and be happy.
Why are their ideas of how to accomplish this different?
Everyone’s path in life is different. We all experience different things. We learn from those experiences, and this informs our world view.
For example, this year besides COVID, the state of Mississippi has decided a new flag should be made for the state that doesn’t include the Union Jack. As I’ve only lived here for just over a year, I felt that my opinion was less important that those who have lived here longer. Instead, I tried to spend time listening to what other’s had to say before voting.
At church one Sunday, a couple of women were talking about the flag being changed, and one of them mentioned that she never thinks of the civil war when she sees the Mississippi state flag. She found it ridiculous that Mississippi has to change it’s state flag. They shouldn’t have to. The other woman agreed with her.
But here’s the thing, both women were white.
I decided I wanted to know what a person who was Black thinks of this debate. So I asked. I was told that when this person moved to Mississippi, they were shocked to see the Stars and Bars all over Mississippi. She shared with me that the Mississippi flag was changed to include the Union Jack, when Mississippi was trying to block black children from being assimilated into white schools. It was used as a symbol to help keep Black children out of White schools. So, not only does it remind them of the civil war, but of their continued struggles as they faced Whites who fought to keep them from receiving the same standards of learning their own children enjoyed.
These are different people’s experiences.
These are their histories.
And here’s the thing about experiences. Someone else’s experiences aren’t any less valid than what we have experienced. Simply because their experiences were different than ours, doesn’t mean that they were wrong and should be disregarded. The white women had good experiences with the flag of Mississippi. To them it represented home, the South, and other good things. For a black woman, it represented repression, and difficult things.
We need to listen to each other’s experiences. As we listen, we need to consider the experiences of the other person. Until we can consider that other people’s experiences are valid, and that perhaps they have a point that we haven’t considered, things aren’t going to change here in the grand ole U. S.A.
I’m not always good at it, but as the election progressed I read headlines from both sides and thought, hm. . . that doesn’t sound quite right. So I’ve looked into the story more. A lot of the time it turns out that the headlines don’t reflect what actually was said or done. But how many of us click share on a post just based on the headline without reading?
There is one particular politician that I really struggle to find anything decent about, and I saw a report that this politician said something that on one hand wouldn’t have been surprising, and on the other was so out there, it made me think twice. I haven’t found what was said reported anywhere else. If it was true, it should have been EVERYWHERE. Reporters couldn’t have left that juicy tidbit alone. So I didn’t share it.
America has voted.
And once again, we find ourselves a country divided. Some believe it’s because America is a wicked place and the division is caused by those who are trying to make it more wicked. Both sides believe that they are working to hold onto important values that the other is trying to get rid of.
Or there is the theory that this division is between those who are working towards change and those who cannot accept change.
Or race wars.
The truth of the matter is is that there is likely some truth to all the claims. There are racial issues in this country. There are people who want good change. People who want bad change, and people who don’t want change. There is wickedness to be found here.
But there is much goodness too.
Have you ever wondered if badness and goodness can exist in the same person? The same country?
I believe it’s true. In all of us there is good and bad and our lives are a struggle of which is going to win us over. Ultimately each side eventually claims their own, and a country is no different.
What bothers me is this constant yelling that the other side is bad and evil. The Republicans and Democrats think the opposite sides are evil, and there is little both sides can agree on. So we find ourselves unable to communicate. We can’t work with them, we don’t trust them. We believe the worst of them.
So I challenge you, to quit seeing everyone as Republicans and Democrats, a Muslim or a Christian, and just see the person.
Who is that person? Does this person have value? Important experiences that lend credence to their beliefs? Is this person, judging by their works, and nothing else, a good person? If so, the rest shouldn’t matter. Believing that someone is at their heart good, and doing their best? Even if we don’t believe in exactly the same things, we can find common ground and common respect.
This is how we will heal our country.
