Big surprise, I know, but for some people, it is. Children with special needs grow up to be adults with special needs. They aren’t as cute. The differences between them and other adults are sometimes more evident. They get less grace because they are considered “old enough to know better.” My child does know better, but that doesn’t mean that he can do better every time, or that he understands “why” it’s better.
Now, instead of going off to college and launching life on their own, many instead finish school and have nowhere to go. My child may end up staying home because jobs aren’t accommodating enough for them to work at. Because they don’t have the skills to live and work on their own. Because even if they have the skills, and an accommodating job, you may not be able to get them to actually do the necessary work.
Parents of special needs children everywhere spend years trying, hoping, praying, and guiding. Hoping that their children can one day fly from the nest. But for many of us, the most we can hope for unless we live in a big metropolitan area is a day hab program. This type of program is set up so that you can drop off your loved one, and they might go do some things, like bowling, or perhaps work on some life skills. But most communities can’t meet the demand for day hab programs or don’t have them at all.
These people are often a silent minority.
Many may not have anyone to speak for them but their parents, or non-profits which may or may not have their best interests at heart. These are people that are considered last when budgets and other considerations are being considered, and first when community programs are being cut. This is the case because they require more time, more money, more support.
How we treat this silent minority also decides what we as a society value.
Do we think that everyone must be Barbie and Ken perfect? Or do we value that not everyone’s contribution will look the same. Being reminded of our own humanity is important. We need these different people to help remind us of that.
Because one day, unless you suddenly get struck down by a car, you are going to find yourself as one of these people. Your mind doesn’t work well anymore, your body refuses to function properly.
You will, one day, join the ranks of the people with special needs, the disabled.
How do you want society to treat you?
My child is one of these people. I am one of these people. People you love are some of these people.
Support your local programs that work with the disabled. Vote yes on legislation to aid them. Be a friend and be kind.
I feel your pain and anxiety