An Ordinary Mom's Musings

Anxiety is literally eating me apart.

One day this past week I couldn’t get my son to go to school and I didn’t figure out until later in the day that it was due to a new testing system. He’s never had any problems taking tests. It makes me wonder if they are following his IEP and actually giving him the testing accommodations he has a legal right to, due to his disabilities. Some of these accommodations are things like having a scribe, having the questions read to him, a bit of extra time, etc. This ensures that he can show what he actually knows, and doesn’t get caught instead in the mechanics of the question. But are these accommodations happening?
I signed paperwork to start a Functional Behavioral Assessment early last week. Things have not been going well in his first year of middle school. He’s reading a book or drawing or watching YouTube videos rather than participating in class and that isn’t going to get him an education.
The Vice Principal called at the end of the day on Friday to let us know that the teachers had come up with a new plan. He would still follow the 6th-grade curriculum track but starting Tuesday, he would be going in and staying with the 8th-grade class. They told me he can do all his work on the computer. But who is going to monitor him to make sure he isn’t on YouTube? If he does all his work on the computer, how will they teach him to work in groups for group projects when that is something he is highly deficient in his ability to do at this time?
They tell me he will still be getting the same content as the 6th graders it will just be a quieter environment that hopefully, will make a better work environment and he will be away from the kids that are setting him off. But how is it appropriate to put a 6th grader who is behind in at least half of his subjects with 8th graders? How are the teachers going to deliver his content, while they are teaching 8th-grade level subjects? He is already behind, there is no way he can keep up with 8th graders.
I am afraid that their next move will be to decide to place him in a self-contained classroom if this doesn’t work. But for him, that would definitely not be the least restrictive environment, and it is the law that he is placed in the least restrictive environment. I am worried that should he be placed there, he wouldn’t get an education. They would just babysit him and he would pick up more inappropriate behaviors in this setting from children who are lower functioning than he is.
Our meeting to discuss all this isn’t scheduled for 3 weeks. The torture of waiting to see what is going to be the educational outcome is crushing because these decisions can really make or break a child’s success and this is MY CHILD.
In the meantime, his behaviors have been escalating. Christmas break and the break in his routine was not our friend.
This has made my anxiety crush me, and insomnia a frequent occurrence. The years of dealing with these situations have given me PTSD with regards to school meetings of any kind. It’s taking my max medications and supplements for me to get through the day. Friday and Saturday after a root canal I couldn’t deal with things. But somehow I have to.
I don’t know why it is this way but it needs to change. Parents with children with Special Needs shouldn’t have to fight SO hard get basic educational needs met. Yet we do, and we will continue to.