Last week I took D to the pediatrician because I was concerned about his hearing. I was hoping his ears were just full of wax or at worst he would need a new set of PE tubes because those have been issues in the past. What they found instead was that he had lost 20 decibels of low-frequency hearing in both ears and 15 decibels of high-frequency hearing in his right ear. Oh, and Audiology can’t get him in for 4 1/2 months.
As a mother of a child with Special Needs and a medically complicated one at that, I have a completely predictable (for me) reaction chain about news like this now that he is 11 and we have been through it multiple times.
First, it’s numb acceptance that we are adding one more diagnosis/issue to the mix. It’s kind of like oh well it’s not like we have anything else to worry about….
Next, my brain goes to immediate worse case scenario. What if he loses all his hearing? We have a dear friend his age who is currently going through that. Will sign language be in his future? Hearing aids? What caused this? He isn’t exposed to loud noises much as he has Autism he can’t handle hearing really loud noises which is common for those with Autism. Was it all the ear infections over the years that we never knew he had unless he was in to see the doctor for something else or when he had tubes and they would start draining?
Extreme frustration due to knowing that we won’t be able to start figuring out the answers for months due to the unavailability of appointments overtakes me. The unavailability of appointments is very common in this world of Special Needs. We do not have enough medical staff in the US to handle the caseloads they have in a timely manner. There is a chronic shortage which is going to become a national emergency soon.
I then go into fixing mode. I’m going to find a way to fix things/support my son no matter what happens. A meme I read yesterday said-
I have no choice, I must, and will find a way to help him. I let the school know so that teachers will understand that things are sounding muffled to him and he is having a hard time hearing. They are making arrangements to see the school audiologist so that we can get things set up to help him learn in class. He’s behind enough in school he doesn’t need to miss hearing things for the next 4 months while we wait to see the audiologist at the Children’s Hospital.
We don’t know what the rest of the year will bring, or the next year, or 5 years with D. All we can do is pray, hope, love him, and try and help him. We might go gray while doing so and develop ulcers but we’ll keep trying.
