“I just know that I want my children to grow up to be adults who seek to help and love other people. To realize that having “things” isn’t everything. So each year I’ll keep working and trying to help them understand. “
Answers
On The Other Side Of The Door
“Autism rages loud, all-consuming, battering at your spirit just as you batter at my door. But it batters at mine too, trying to pull us down into the abyss of this meltdown. An Autism meltdown for you, a questioning of my Motherhood meltdown for me. Am I doing this right? Do I have the skills for this? Can I really do this?”
Unexpected Gifts on Vacation
This summer our family was on vacation and due to a lot of reasons (sickness and allergies being chief) it was a difficult vacation. What I didn’t expect though were some unusual but great experiences we had on our vacation.
First, I had the opportunity to meet with a Mom who was struggling to find supports in her area. I don’t think I helped much as I don’t live in the area and could only offer general information, but I hopefully helped her find people who can help. This was good for me as it reminded me of why I do what I do. I remember starting this journey of Special Needs and not having any answers that I needed. I didn’t know where to find supports or how to find them. I swore to myself at that time I would do everything I could to keep other parents from that situation. This experience also gave me a chance to reflect on and say a prayer for all those who have helped me on my journey. I really appreciated that, and I enjoyed making a new friend.
Next, we were visiting some cousins and a 13-year-old with Autism kept coming by to visit. He is pretty severely impacted with Autism and kept escaping from his parent’s home. It filled me with so much joy to see how kindly these cousins interacted with him. If I could clone them and populate the world with them I would, because our kids need people like them who see their beauty and worth and treat them accordingly.
The third experience was meeting up with one of my husband’s best friends from High School. They, like us, have one boy and one girl with the boy having autism. We’ve known many children with autism and while D has enjoyed playing with them I have never seen him connect with another child the way he did with this young man. After dinner, the boys rode in our car back to Grandma’s while the girls rode in the other car. Listening to the two boys in the back of the car nearly brought me to tears! They understood each other on a level no one has understood D before. They “scripted” together (reciting movies line for line), enjoying every minute. 
D told him of what he someday dreams of doing and the young man thought his plans were awesome. I could kick myself for not having spent more time with this family over the years. The girls had a great time too, but listening to those boys in the car was something I wasn’t sure D would ever find. That was truly special.
Vacations and getting out of our bubble can be really hard for families of Special Needs kids. But in spite of everything, it can also be really worth it.
