Pre-Algebra Archives - An Ordinary Mom's Musings

The journey of a special needs parent is both stunningly beautiful and utterly heartbreaking. Often with one coming closely on the heels of the other or at the same time.

I have made my peace that our parenting journey doesn’t look like everyone else’s.

But it doesn’t mean this year is an easy one.

Be gentle with me.

This year my son should be in his senior year of high school with senior pictures, parties, and all the fun senior things to look forward to. It should be a year of celebration.

But our year isn’t going to look like that. Be gentle with me.

Instead, he started 10th grade over again because he didn’t quite have enough credits last year completed to finish it. He was already behind, but he was one point away from being able to pass his Pre-Algebra class after taking the class for the 4th time. The good news is that we switched tutors to one who specializes in learning difficulties and after taking it for a 5th time, he passed with an A.

We tried to get him a summer job last summer to start edging him into the adult world. But that didn’t happen between state funding being cut so they couldn’t do the job placement program we had been working toward, and mom only having spare minutes here and there to help him learn how to fill out applications. He got a call back from one, but when he called them and spoke to them, they brushed him off.

I have learned that I need to work at his pace, and his pace isn’t being a graduating senior this year. The fact that he has made it this far despite literally sleeping through his entire middle school experience is honestly a miracle.

But it doesn’t mean that I won’t be grieving what could have been this year.

Be gentle with me.

When I see the senior pictures, when I see the graduation invitations, my heart is going to hurt. He won’t be leaving for college in the fall or getting his first apartment.

Be gentle with me.

I’ll be over here cheering him on. Cheering that he FINALLY passed his pre-algebra class. Cheering because he finally had a semester where he passed every single class! Cheering he made it to 11th grade mid-year. Cheering that if he continues he should (fingers crossed) graduate next year.

Our journey isn’t the typical one, but it will make the celebration all the sweeter once it gets here.

*This previously appeared on Her View From Home.

What does it take to awaken the advocacy mama bear in me?

When we lived in Alaska and Washington State, I spent a lot of time advocating for those with special needs. I testified before a state committee, appeared on television, picketed the state disability offices, provided help to families with Individual Education plans (IEPs), and formed a group that worked on helping those with disabilities be heard and get what they needed, and getting a special needs PTA up and running. We moved to Mississippi and 6 months later COVID started. I haven’t been involved with advocacy here at all. It wasn’t that there weren’t things that needed advocating for. It was more that with going back to school, working, and the shutdown of COVID I didn’t have the time or things were so influx due to COVID no one knew what was going on. No one knew how IDEA and FAPE applied in a COVID world.

Why did the advocacy mama bear awaken again?

A school saying that despite my son finally passing pre-algebra after taking it 5 times, it will not count as a math credit. Because the class was not passed while my son was in 9th grade, they are saying that the state is it cannot count as a math credit. It will count instead as an elective credit. What this means is that my son is starting from scratch on his math credits and in his final semester of school he will have to take 2 math classes at once, and take a harder math class than he would need to graduate because he has no math credits currently. This is my child who has dyscalculia- a math disability.

Dear state legislatures and educators-

It shouldn’t matter which grade a child passes a math class as long as they pass it.

Calleen Petersen

Mississippi ranks at the bottom on many measures of education. Why are we making it harder for children to graduate for nonsensical reasons? Have you heard of IDEA? How about IEPs? Do you need a refresher course?

This is what it took to wake me up. In social work, advocacy is part of the job on a macro and micro level. I will not stop until this policy is changed, not just for my son, but for everyone else. And then I may turn my efforts to their “graduation track” policy that has been struck down in other states.

Mississippi, you don’t know what you just unleashed.