“So often we think of disabilities as hard, horrible things. Yet here was my daughter saying that she was proud of one of hers.”
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Respect
Why We Say No To Slumber Parties
I had a unique slumber party when I was probably 10 or 11, compared to a lot of other slumber parties. My family owned a small motel. I was able to invite about 10 girls over for a slumber party in one of our motel rooms, sans chaperones. We spent the night binging on tv and snacks and at one point after midnight, snuck out down the street for a bit. If my parents only knew. . .
But not all slumber parties are fun.
Not all slumber parties end well.
I overheard girls talking about me and others when they thought I was asleep. It wasn’t kind.
Generally, it has been our practice not to allow our kids to have, or participate in sleepovers.
My number one reason?
I was going to say-
Because kids are a complete mess the next morning from not sleeping the night before. I’m all for my kids having fun and spending time with friends. Dealing with the aftermath of not enough sleep.
But the real reason is safety.
Did you know that most children who are trafficked in the U.S. are trafficked not by a stranger but by a family member or someone they know?
At slumber parties things get tried for the first time- pills, alcohol, smoking, touching, and experimenting.
My kids will make choices.
But I want to make sure that they are old enough to understand the choices and the consequences they are making. I don’t think it’s fair to make them deal with circumstances they aren’t ready to deal with.
Am I sheltering my children?
Maybe.
But I also know that the longer they go without smoking, the less likely it is they will ever smoke.
The longer they go without drinking, doing drugs, the less likely this is going to be a problem for them. Not that they won’t ever try them, because they might. But the longer it is that they don’t, the better.
My children are totally capable of making mistakes and do frequently. So do I for that matter.
Giving them the time to figure out how they feel about things, to learn the information for themselves, and give them a chance to see others making mistakes is priceless. So I’m going to keep sheltering my children for a little while longer while giving them freedoms to choose that I feel are appropriate.
George Floyd, Riots, and a Door Opening
“I can’t pretend to know what the answers for moving forward are. But a door has opened wide for all of us. It is time for us to take a good hard look at ourselves and take a step through that door. A door to a place where we truly live the words that we have been taught. The teachings that God loves everyone. That there is no difference in his love for anyone based on their skin color or anything else. He just loves us all because we are his children, and treats us all equally. And so should we.”
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We ALL Need a Hug
“We ALL need a hug right now.
At a time when people are dying due to a pandemic and we are social distancing to protect ourselves and others, how do we meet the emotional and mental health needs that we have?”
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Pictures Hold A Thousand Memories
“I thought I looked fat and ugly from pregnancy and I couldn’t stand looking at the picture. It made me cringe. It was hidden in the depths of a photo album never given a place of honor. Just stuffed in there with random loose photos.”
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I Can’t Tell What You’re Saying
“Last week I was in Walmart with my son. As we waited in line to check out I was noticing the amount of people wearing facial masks and thinking, ”I really miss seeing people’s smiles, I can’t tell if how they are feeling with their face under a mask.”
And then it hit me.
This is how my son has viewed the world.”
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It Doesn’t Take Much to Minister To Others
“Somewhere living in New York there is a Jewish woman who is the best example of ministering to others I have ever known. I’ve never met her yet she ministers to me daily. She is my model of how I should be serving others.”
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Your Experience is Different Than Mine
Wether your world is the special needs world or not, everyone’s experiences are valid. This is where they are coming from. It’s where you are coming from. If we listen we can find common ground to stand together on the important things and stop fighting. Because who has the strength and energy to fight?
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“Own Voices” vs Special Needs Parents
“The big push currently in the special needs world is to include the voices of adults or children in our discussions of treatment and taking their experiences under consideration. People who actually experience the issue weighing in on their treatment.
I think this is a good thing. Their voices NEED to be heard and they have been silenced for too long.
But. . .
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Sometimes Parents Need To Get Out Of The Way
“Sometimes as parents, we need to get out of our children’s way. We need to let them step forward and fail spectacularly or nail it. Or land somewhere in between.”
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