An Ordinary Mom's Musings

I had a unique slumber party when I was probably 10 or 11, compared to a lot of other slumber parties. My family owned a small motel. I was able to invite about 10 girls over for a slumber party in one of our motel rooms, sans chaperones. We spent the night binging on tv and snacks and at one point after midnight, snuck out down the street for a bit. If my parents only knew. . .

But not all slumber parties are fun.

Not all slumber parties end well.

I overheard girls talking about me and others when they thought I was asleep. It wasn’t kind.

Generally, it has been our practice not to allow our kids to have, or participate in sleepovers.

My number one reason?

I was going to say-

Because kids are a complete mess the next morning from not sleeping the night before. I’m all for my kids having fun and spending time with friends. Dealing with the aftermath of not enough sleep.

But the real reason is safety.

Did you know that most children who are trafficked in the U.S. are trafficked not by a stranger but by a family member or someone they know?

At slumber parties things get tried for the first time- pills, alcohol, smoking, touching, and experimenting.

My kids will make choices.

But I want to make sure that they are old enough to understand the choices and the consequences they are making. I don’t think it’s fair to make them deal with circumstances they aren’t ready to deal with.

Am I sheltering my children?

Maybe.

But I also know that the longer they go without smoking, the less likely it is they will ever smoke.

The longer they go without drinking, doing drugs, the less likely this is going to be a problem for them. Not that they won’t ever try them, because they might. But the longer it is that they don’t, the better.

My children are totally capable of making mistakes and do frequently. So do I for that matter.

Giving them the time to figure out how they feel about things, to learn the information for themselves, and give them a chance to see others making mistakes is priceless. So I’m going to keep sheltering my children for a little while longer while giving them freedoms to choose that I feel are appropriate.